Empathy is the ability to understand and to share the feelings of another. It is the ability to be aware of the feelings of others and imagine what it might be like to be in their position or to be in their shoes. It is similar to but different from sympathy which means sharing a certain feeling with someone, having the same feelings they do or having compassion for someone’s feelings. Empathy is a key ingredient in positive friendships and relationships. It reduces conflict and misunderstandings, leads to helping behavior and greater success in life in general.
You can find a guide for parents in biglifejournal.com/blogs/blog/key-strategies-teach-children-empathy. As with any skill empathy can be taught and developed. Because cognitive abilities and life experiences develop over time, the most effective strategies to use depend on the child’s age.
For children 3-5 years you can do the following: Help children recognize their emotions and body language by observing them and labeling such as “You’re clenching your fists. You stomped your feet. You seem angry.” You can read stories and discuss character’s feelings. You can coach their social skills.
For children 5-7 years you can use pictures from magazines or print pictures that show sad, angry or happy faces. You can help children understand what they have in common with others. You can help them note body language of others and guess how they might be feeling.
For children 7-9 years you can discuss how characters in a book are feeling and why. You can choose an emotion, then brainstorm what you might say, think, and do when you feel that way. It is important that they also understand they don’t have to take on the problems and needs of everyone around them.
For children 12 years and up you can discuss current events and encourage your child to choose volunteer work.
Any time you want to teach a skill to a child, it is important to model it. When you are upset with or giving consequences to your child you can model empathy even when you are feeling angry, disappointed, or hurt. Talk openly about emotions rather than dismissing or burying them. Let’s say your child is scared of the dark. Instead of saying “there is nothing to be afraid of” ask them “are you scared of the dark? What scares you about the dark?”
Never punish a child for feeling sad or angry. Make it clear that all emotions are welcome and learn how to manage them through discussion and reflection.
Helping others develops kindness and caring. It can give children the opportunity to interact with people of diverse background, ages and circumstances making it easier to show empathy for all people. When your child shows empathy for others praise the specific behavior. “You brought your sister a Band-Aid for her scraped knee so she could feel better. That was so kind and helpful.”
May you and your children feel happy, safe, healthy and live with ease.
By Sally Robinson
Sally Robinson, MD Clinical Professor
Keeping Kids Healthy
12/25/2019
Also See: UTMB Pediatrics - Pediatric Primary Care
Guide for parents: biglifejournal.com/blogs/blog/key-strategies-teach-children-empathy